It Occurred to Me...

while I was responding to Scott's comment on yesterday's post,

that because I struggle to call myself an artist, 

others may struggle to call me one too.

I guess it is the same philosophy as 

you must love and accept yourself

before someone else can love and accept you.

Dusty is awfully dusty!  Our rugged barn cat...

I think maybe I have trouble calling myself an artist for three reasons.

First, when I was in 5th grade,

my art teacher told me, while examining my latest creation in her class,

 in her very authoritative

(and quite witchy)

voice...

"You are not an artist and never will be."

I was devastated.

From that moment on I believed her.

I was not an artist and never would be.

So, why should I even try any longer?

And I didn't.

Every time I begin to think I might have some talent,

I hear her voice in the back of my head

telling me over and over that I am not an artist

and never will be.

Secondly,

I view what I do as more of a science as opposed to an art.

I know that sounds weird, 

but photography has a lot to do with science.

One must understand how the camera works,

how film (or a sensor) works, 

how ISO, aperture, and shutter speed work together

and what effect those three elements will have

in the final image.

You must know about light temperature

and light direction...

light fall off,

depth of field,

and motion.

All of these things are very scientific.

I would agree that there are certainly artistic elements

such as the rule of thirds, leading lines, proportions, and such.

The science of photography came to me much faster

than the artistic part.

I still struggle with my artistic "eye"

but over the years it is getting easier and more natural.

Mostly I see photography as a science, so "mad scientist"

fits me much better than "artist."

Third,

with the invention of digital photography

there are so many people out there who 

have a digital camera and call themselves photographers.

Because I have yet to make an income 

that I could support myself on,

I don't consider myself a professional photographer.

I know income does not necessarily define success, but still...

So, those are the reasons

why I have trouble considering myself an artist.

And I need to figure out a way to get over that

if I expect others to see me as one.