Do You Ever Think About...

what you would do if the time machine was not a mere figment of the imagination?

Would you want to travel back in time

and revisit a specific period of your life?

Would you want to change the outcome of

a specific incident?

Would you use it to settle arguments about how 

something happened?

How many times do you remember something 

totally differently than another person and you both

swear you are right?

Would you do it if you knew there was a risk

that it would change how your life ended up?

Would you do it if there was a guarantee that 

things would still turn out the same?

Y'all know how my brain works.  

As I was driving yesterday and 

I thought back through events in my life 

and what I would do if I 

were given the chance to go back and

make different decisions.

What would my life look like now if I 

made this decision or that decision...

like one of those 

Choose Your Own Adventure Books.

And then, of course, 

that leads to the religious based question of free will.

Do we truly have free will or is our life mapped out for us?

Would we still be where we are if we had made different decisions

along the path of life

because this is exactly where we are supposed to be 

according to divine laws?

Hmmmmmm...

I am always thinking and wondering.

I wish my brain had an off switch.

So, would you?

Would you take a ride in a time machine?

If so, under what circumstances

and what period of your life would you visit?

Love Does Not Consist...

in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.

~Antoine De Saint-Exupery

I saw this couple at Hershey Park and they were so sweet to watch.

I am not so sure I agree with that quote.  

I think I definitely would prefer

gazing into the eyes of the one I love.

However, I see the author's point...

By not looking at each other, 

you forget to focus on the physical aspects 

of the one you love, 

which may change as age takes ahold of us,

 and instead concentrate on the qualities within

that attracted you to him to begin with.

And if you are facing the same direction

and moving forward, 

you will match each other step by step,

never failing to leave the side of your lover.

But if you are gazing into each other's eyes,

blinded by infatuation,

you are sure to trip and stumble over the obstacles 

that lie ahead because you can't see them

and navigate around them together.

All makes sense to me...

but...

I would still prefer to gaze into the man I love's eyes.

Cuz they are pretty dang handsome.

Wordless Wednesday-Christmas Trolley

All Aboard!

I Know I am Horrible for Saying This...

but I am glad Christmas is over.

I know, I know...

BaHumbug.

It was exhausting for me this year
and I did not really get a chance to enjoy it.
I was tired and grouchy and pretty much
Grinch-ish.
Hopefully next year I will have a better handle
on the holidays and it will be more enjoyable.

One of the funniest things that happened this Christmas
was the twins ran right past the tree and presents on
Christmas morning and headed straight to see if the
milk and cookies were still there.
T1 exclaimed, "Mama!  The cookies are GONE!"
They were more impressed with the disappearance of the cookies
than the tree full of presents underneath!

And after all the opening of gifts was finished,
T2's favorite thing was his scissors that Santa put in his stocking.
He was a cutting fiend.
He cut paper into strips and then into smaller strips,
over and over
until he finally had what resembled confetti.
So much for the expensive stuff...
a $1.99 pair of scissors did the trick for him.

Hoping all of you had a joyous Christmas and
weren't Grinchy like me.

Now on to the New Year!

Have a Very Merry Christmas

Wishing you and yours a very merry Christmas 

 from all of us here on These Nine Acres to all of you. 

May your day be filled with joy and love and may all your wishes be fulfilled.

With love, Tracey, Brian, Ty, Ladybug, T1 and T2

Wordless Wednesday: Harrisburg...

...as seen out the passenger side window

going 55mph.

The Amazing Parts...

Ladybug and T1 at Hershey Park

T2 LOVES having Ty teach him big boy things...he craves Ty's attention

Um, Ty...I think you need to STOP growing LOL!  Poor Ty could not fit his head under the roof.

There are many amazing things about adopting children...

especially foster children.

But for me

the most scrumptious part of all

is watching my older children benefit from it

just as much as the little ones.

When we first started the fostering process

Brian and I had many, many discussions

and sleepless nights about how it might 

negatively effect Ty and Ladybug.

At the time we started fostering they were 12 and 10...

a long time to be a sibling set of two.

We thought the adjustment for them might 

possibly be a catastrophe.

But we kept a close eye on them

and while it wasn't always peaches and cream,

they adjusted well and it wasn't long before 

we couldn't remember what life was like without the twins.

♥♥♥

We went to Hershey Park this past weekend 

for our very first overnight family vacation

with all six of us.

I was expecting the teens to be grouchy about 

lunch with Santa

and roll their eyes at having to wait for their little

brother and sister

to ride the kiddie rides.

But instead I was so delighted when 

I saw both Ty and Ladybug anxiously volunteer

and participate in making this trip extra special for the twins.

And in doing so,

they themselves had a great time,

enjoying watching their brother and sister

experience rides for the first time,

a hotel for the first time,

a cloth napkin for the first time...

It's interesting...

when people find out that the twins

were adopted out of the foster care system

they burst with admiration and tell us 

what we are doing is amazing and saving the twin's lives.

But the truth is

Ty, Ladybug, Brian, and I are blessed

to watch these two little miracles grow

and learn and develop unique personalities.

They have changed and touched our lives in a way

that no one could ever possibly understand 

unless you are an adoptive family.

Yes, we may have saved them,

but they have also saved us.

Quiet Time

Quiet time?

What is that?

I don't remember...

but when I do have a chance to figure it out again,

(hopefully after the holidays)

I have my book list ready and waiting!

One of my favorite me time activities is reading,

preferably in the bathtub,

and while I do love my Ipad with the Kindle and Nook apps,

I also love a good ole' paper book.

I already shared with you The Elf on the Shelf,

but I haven't mentioned the other two titles yet.

Then & Now: Mathews County is a book I am 

especially looking forward to for two reasons.

First, my good blogging friend, Janice Vogel,

wrote this book!

It is her first book and she has put her heart and soul into it.

As soon as I knew the release date, I ordered my copy

from Amazon and was so excited when it showed up on my doorstep.

I am also excited, because two summers ago I was 

lucky enough to visit Janice and other of my dear

blogging buddies at Blogfest, which Janice

hosted at her beautiful house in Mathews County.

She and other local bloggers took us on tour 

and so I have seen some of the places I am sure I will read about

in her brand spanking new book.

And besides, it has all kinds of then and now photos,

and you know how I love my photos!

Congratulations, Janice!

The other book shown here is Transcendence Dr. Norman E. Rosenthal,

who happens to be my husband's client,

and is the doctor who pioneered research into SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder.

He was so generous as to send us a signed copy of his book, 

which has a forward written by Dr. Mehmet Oz.

I have been long interested in the practice of meditation

and am looking forward to reading about the benefits 

of transcendental meditation.

Not sure I will ever be able to do it...

my brain is a mess...1000 thoughts at once...

but it is worth a try!

The other book on my iPad right now is Steve Jobs biography.

I have started it but haven't gotten very far,

not because it isn't interesting, but because I've not had time.

The book club I belong to will start up again in January

and this is the book I need to be prepared to discuss...

gotta get crackin'.

Have you read any good books lately?

Meet Winston...

...the scout elf that Santa sent to watch over the kids and report back to him.

Winston is a sneaky elf who enjoys eating.

The twins gave him a good talking to when they awoke this morning

and found him back from the North Pole eating THEIR Christmas cookies.

They were not happy with Winston at all and told him so!

They were careful to be respectful, though,

as they knew Winston was listening and would tell Santa if they were mean.

If you are not familiar with The Elf on the Shelf,

you must see the website and if you have young children or grandchildren,

you must buy this book!

We have started our family tradition this year 

and even Ty and Ladybug are getting into it,

helping Winston find a new hiding spot each night

after the twins go to bed.

Thanks to Jess, 

who encouraged us to buy the book and get started

after I balked at it the first time.

You have to bop over to her blog to see her scout elf, Fred,

who is much sneakier and more creative than Winston :)

Have a great weekend, y'all!

Sunrise On the Hills

I stood upon the hills, when heaven's wide arch
Was glorious with the sun's returning march,
And woods were brightened, and soft gales
Went forth to kiss the sun-clad vales.
The clouds were far beneath me; bathed in light,
They gathered mid-way round the wooded height,
And, in their fading glory, shone
Like hosts in battle overthrown.
As many a pinnacle, with shifting glance.
Through the gray mist thrust up its shattered lance,
And rocking on the cliff was left
The dark pine blasted, bare, and cleft.
The veil of cloud was lifted, and below
Glowed the rich valley, and the river's flow
Was darkened by the forest's shade,
Or glistened in the white cascade;
Where upward, in the mellow blush of day,
The noisy bittern wheeled his spiral way.

I heard the distant waters dash,
I saw the current whirl and flash,
And richly, by the blue lake's silver beach,
The woods were bending with a silent reach.
Then o'er the vale, with gentle swell,
The music of the village bell
Came sweetly to the echo-giving hills;
And the wild horn, whose voice the woodland fills,
Was ringing to the merry shout,
That faint and far the glen sent out,
Where, answering to the sudden shot, thin smoke,
Through thick-leaved branches, from the dingle broke.

If thou art worn and hard beset
With sorrows, that thou wouldst forget,
If thou wouldst read a lesson, that will keep
Thy heart from fainting and thy soul from sleep,
Go to the woods and hills! No tears
Dim the sweet look that Nature wears.

~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

If you have never been a fan of poetry,

try reading it aloud.  

(Make sure you are by yourself or your office mates

or family members might think you fell off your rocker...)

It is so beautiful to hear Longfellow's words

slide from the mouth with such a beautiful rhythm.

Unless you are my husband, 

in which case, you would simply say

"There are too many thous" 

after reading it!

The sound of the words aloud is so intoxicating and romantic to me.

I wish I could write like that!

I love the last stanza of this Longfellow poem.

"If thou are worn and hard beset; with sorrows, that thou wouldst forget...

Go to the woods and hills! No tears; Dim the sweet look that Nature wears."

So true.

So true.

I Have Sailed a Thousand Ships to You...

but my messages don't seem to make it through.

~Rachel Platten

Have you ever felt like you were banging your head against a brick wall

over and over and over again?

And finally you figure out that if you stop banging your head

all the pain goes away?

Have you ever noticed that when someone doesn't understand you,

your voice tends to get louder and louder

until you feel like you are screaming even though

they can hear you just fine?

But then you whisper what you have to say and they get it?

Weird.

Sending all my love out into the universe today.

Can you feel it?

(If you have not yet, please visit my new Postcards Page by clicking the tab at the top of the page.

Thanks to all who have sent us postcards and to those who will in the future.)

Photo Booth Fun

 Saturday we celebrated the T1 and T2's 4th birthday.

Every now and again you have to let go and have a bit of fun.

So, to commemorate the day, I decided to do an impromptu

vintage feel photo booth!

Everyone, except the two teen boys in attendance,

my son and my nephew who are apparently too cool for photo booths,

participated.

I don't show all of them here, but this is a sampling:

There was a lot of tongue-sticking-outing

and the twins were thrilled they were not only allowed to do that

but actually encouraged to do so! 

Ladybug was in charge of collecting silly props for the booth.

She did a great job.

Know what else she did great?

Monopolizing the booth!

My girl is not shy in front of a camera...

Thanks to all my family,

including my amazing parents who joined the festivities via Skype,

(isn't technology wonderful?)

for making the day a very special one for the twins.

They had a great time and we have many memories 

(silly ones at that)

preserved in the form photo strips!

The Bag

Mom's Bible, Grandmother's pearls and Avon talc tin

Grandmother's locket with my grandfather and my brother and me pictured inside

The other day I was searching for something...

I can't recall now what it was but that has no bearing on this story.

As I dug through places and crevices that have been 

long unexplored around my basement,

I came across a plastic bag...

you know the kind:

thin, crinkly plastic bag that almost every store uses now days.

I call it a "Wal Mart" bag even if it didn't come from Wal Mart.

As I recall, this bag, 

discovered in the bottom of a corner hutch that has 

not been in use for many years,

was actually from a hardware store and not Wal Mart at all.

I knew whatever I was searching for would not 

fit in that bag, especially with the handles tied in a knot 

the way they were, concealing the contents inside.

Despite knowing I had not found what I was looking for, 

I couldn't help but to pick up the bag and look inside...

what could be hiding down there in that hutch?

I carefully retrieved the bag and after extracting myself

from among all the various pieces of stacked, unused furniture,

I went about opening it to see what treasures might be inside.

As soon as felt the bag, 

I knew there was something of substance in there.

The bag was heavy.

Feeling through the thin plastic,

 I could make out what felt like a few books 

in addition to some oddly shaped items.

Cautiously I untied the handles and peeked inside.

As soon as I saw what was inside a rush of memories

came back to me as if I were watching a movie of my life...

inside were some belongings to family members that had died many years ago.

I found my mother's worn and weathered white leather Bible.

(My mother is still alive, thank goodness)

I found my grandmother's Bible 

with various bookmarks still holding the place of special verses

she wanted to remember.

I found my paternal grandmother's pearls,

an ornately designed Avon talc bottle in its original box,

some various pins advertising a class reunion held sometime in the 50's,

a beautiful locket with a picture of my grandfather, myself, and my brother inside

and

my maternal grandfather's cremation certificate.

This bag must have been one of the many that I brought home

after cleaning out my grandparent's home...

A few treasures I picked out to help me remember them.

Or perhaps this is a bag my mother gave me for safe keeping

as I tend to be the sentimental one in the family 

as well as the family historian.

I am not sure how or why the bag came to be in the bottom corner of a hutch

that is no longer used,

but I am glad I found these treasures again.

It wasn't so much the items that I loved to find,

it was the memories that they sparked in my mind

and I felt like,

for just a few minutes,

I got to have a visit with my beloved and very missed grandparents.

Apparently, Santa's Little Helpers...

are too cool for their hats :)

T1 and T2 are sending their holiday cheer to you and yours.

Perseverance

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, 

the stream always wins--

not through strength but by perseverance.

~H. Jackson Brown

If all difficulties were known

at the outset of a long journey,

most of us would never start out at all.

~Dan Rather with Peter Wyden

Stillness

As seen when I was stuck on a cliff in Maine.  :)

It occurred to me today...

How ironic is it that one of human kind's most 

deeply seeded desires is for stillness...

stillness within one's self,

and yet,

even if we find complete stillness inside our minds, hearts, and soul,

the world to which we belong is ever moving.

The oceans roll

the winds blow,

the tectonic plates shift,

the clouds gather and dissipate,

lava flows,

the earth rotates and orbits .

There is never a stillness on earth,

this living, breathing, moving planet we call home.

Maybe that is why we desire stillness so much.

After all, isn't it human nature to desire that which we can not have?

Life Is So Short

Farmland in Virgina as seen from the passenger side of my truck :)

Life is so short.

There are days when the mysteries of life

are so overwhelming to me

that I get frustrated and wonder what this is all about.

Why are we here?

Is it to learn lessons and move on to another realm?

No, couldn't be.

If that were it, why would newborn children die?

Is it for the entertainment of a higher power?

If so then he/she/it must have one sick sense of humor.

Are we here simply because the right combination

of chemicals happened to combine with the right 

atmospheric pressure and VOILA...humans were made

and so there really is no purpose and life is random?

I don't know, but it makes me angry when 

bad things happen to good people

and we lose ones we love who are

way too young, way too loved, way too needed, and way too wanted 

to an early death.

It seems so senseless.

It seems such a waist.

It seems so cruel.

Maybe I am just getting older and am losing my childlike faith

in the world, in human kind, and maybe even in religion.

Maybe it is my husband's fault,

who happens to be a very cut and dry, logical

I-don't-believe-it-till-I-see-it person

and his way of looking at things has rubbed off on me 

over the past 16 years.

Maybe I am having a pre-midlife crisis.

Or maybe I am at my mid life and just don't know it.

I might die young too...who knows.

A Buddha quote just came into my mind...

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, 

concentrate the mind on the present moment."

Buddha knew that if we try to figure it all out...

what the future holds for us,

we will miss out on our present.

And if we miss out on our present then we never really lived at all.

You Are Beautiful

Please visit my Driveby Shootings Series on Flickr

I'm not sure how to start this story...

whether to ask you if you believe in angels here on earth...

or ask if you believe in paying it forward 

or if you think karma and energy influences us~what comes around goes around.

Or just jump right into describing this really strange yet

inspiring encounter that happened to me the other day.

I guess I will just tell you what happened

and leave it to you to decide what you think about it.

The other day I was in a particularly stressed mood...

feeling very angry at the world and down in the dumps;

if truth be told.

I had a lot on my mind and even more things

to accomplish on my mile long agenda list.

Some of the items on my to-do list did not particularly 

thrill me and so I was in a state of dread.

You know how you get when you know there are things 

that must be completed and you just don't want to do them?

Grumpy, irritable, and not feeling very beautiful inside or out.

I pulled into the parking lot of the office, 

noticing as I did,

a maintenance truck sitting in front of the door.

There were two men near the truck,

both scruffy looking and quite rough around the edges.

I sat for a moment, 

not really wanting to walk past them and engage in any form of 

human interaction due to my grumpiness,

and watched one of the men go into the same office 

in which I needed to go.

Reluctantly I got out of my truck

and made my way past the maintenance truck,

behind which the second man had disappeared,

and into the office where I needed to pick up the keys

to the new building where I will be working.

After quickly retrieving the keys from the secretary,

I headed back outside, thankful to have avoided 

the maintenance man that had just gone in and

thankful that the secretary didn't seem to be the chatty kind.

As I walked past the maintenance truck yet again, 

I heard a man's voice from behind the truck say

something that was inaudible to me.

It was clear to me,

since I was the only person in the parking lot besides him,

that he was speaking to me, 

but I didn't understand what he had said.

As I approached the back of the truck,

there stood the second maintenance man,

who, upon seeing me walk around the truck,

seemed embarrassed to have said something.

He clearly didn't mean whatever he said to

be heard by me and when he saw me he 

said, "Oh, I thought you were Stan...Sorry about that."

I smiled, thankful that he wasn't going to start a conversation,

and answered back that it was ok...

I disappeared into the new office space the company I work for is renting

and checked to make sure they had cleaned the space 

as well as what they had promised (which they did, it turns out),

and then headed right back out again into the parking lot.

When I stepped out I found the second maintenance man

leaning against his truck.

Casting my eyes to the ground, 

I gritted my jaw and walked briskly toward my own truck,

again, not wanting to engage in any conversation.

But dang nabbit, just as I passed him,

the man said,

"Excuse me."

I replied with a short, curt,

"Yes?"

And this is where it gets weird.

He, this scraggly, dirty, unkempt maintenance man,

looked me straight in the eye and said

with the warmest and most sincere voice,

"Just in case no one else tells you today...

You are beautiful."

I stopped dead in my tracks.

I know it sounds like he was trying to hit on me

or be creepy...

but I am here to tell you that it was not like that at all.

It felt like he was not even talking about my appearance at all, actually.

It felt like his eyes could see my soul

and he was telling me that my insides were beautiful...

my heart and my spirit.

That one sentence changed my whole day.

I smiled warmly back at him and I told him thank you.

I told him that I needed to hear that today and I really appreciated him.

He smiled back and told me I was welcome.

I walked to my truck, 

got in, and felt so warm inside.

Yes, I was beautiful, wasn't I?

Even with my grumpiness and attitude,

I was still beautiful inside.

And for the rest of the day

I tried to pay it forward

and greet each person I saw with a warm

heart felt smile

and a genuine hello.

And my day that had started so poorly 

turned around just like that...

With one sentence from a stranger.

So, my friends, I am saying this to you...

Just in case no one else tells you today...YOU are beautiful.